Idea's and Inspiration
I'm asked this daily whether it is through Social Media or emails. It is a daily occurrence whether I want it to be or not. Truth be known, I have no inspiration anymore. Why? Because after years of being shot down for my own idea's, I've just left that side of myself, and hadn't recovered it. Now for idea's I have tons daily it is a matter if I want to write the story out or not. I've had people really question on my ability as an Author and why I do it? I do it cause it is something I love doing.
My inspirations used to come from crushes, some porn, and other stories that I would read. Since A Coffee Shop Romance, I've given up on any inspiration for what stories should be. I do take my writing more seriously than I had before but I'm disconnected in matters that should matter. Inspiration is to help build these stories that I've loved doing for years but anymore it is like tossing a penny with hopes something reaches someone with my books.
Can I get inspiration back? Probably not. After years of hearing how bad my books are or that I'm not good enough because I live off of the Government for assistance, it has been a slap to me, and who I am. The only true reason I began this journey was for an outlet of my own sexuality. I wasn't allowed to have a woman in my life and my life path was chosen for me. My dreams and desires are in my stories for these very reasons. Are they reality? Hell no, it is all fictionally based for a reason.
I've been asked many times if I will ever write a Straight Romance? I have considered it many, many, many, many times. Worst part is feeling that I'm not good enough to write those type of books and not my interest. Okay, not true, I have a Romantasy Trilogy that will be based off a FMC (female main character) and MMC (male main character) but it will also involve LGBTQIA+ characters too for the female main characters journey. Beyond that I have no idea, it is still a work in progress at this point.
Why am I still writing if I have no inspiration? Because in my eyes stories still matter. Stories need to be set free. It's a matter if I actually release these stories to the Public or keep them on Writing Apps to savor for myself and other readers which will eventually happen probably in 2026 after Sweet Summers is released to the world. Otherwise, I'm not in need of the Public eye as much as others think. To be fair, I miss being a nobody on Wattpad without anyone knowing who I am and destroying me piece by piece. I loved being buried in my own worlds without the constant eyes and judgements.
Anyways, it is off to the world of writing some more. I just wanted to express this in a matter with hopes others will understand. Writing is supposed to be fun and should be left that way.
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